The Real Path of Radiance
by typhoon-4434
Summary: Well I made this in five minutes, and well it isnt as good as the True Tales of Symphonia....Spoilers and swears....


**Fire Emblem: Path of Radiance**

One day in the land of Tellius, a young lad...err Ranger... named Ike was practising sword fighting with his beloved father. Afterwards he became a dangerous mercenary...ooooo. Anyways, on his first mission, the super hot Titania, the mega awesome Boyd, and the uber Oscar go to save people from bad people. They win, then on the next mission, the awesome Rhys helps. He owns because he is a priest, and priests molest hot woman, so hes good in my books. After that ordeal of saving children, then do more things, and Shinon the Sniper of womanizing, and sniper in general and Gatrie, the womanizer of woman join. They kill pirates and meet a hot Pegasus knight (did I say she was hot?). After the mass killin Soren joins (yay). Hes an emo cool Mage that can own people.

After many ordeals, they rescue the super sexy Princess of Crimea, more commonly known as "Suck more Bitch". Anyways they then travel to Gallia, land of hot anthro people known as Laguz. On the way the Infamous Enigmatic Black Knight kills Ike's daddy. He was like, "I'm too cool for swords, so I'm gonna try and kill you with this blunt axe." The black knight is like " Eat sword you bastardly mentor o' mine.". So Gawain died, aka Greil, master of Heroness, and Ikipoo cried..., and Shinon and Gatrie leave, because they're so cool. Afterwards they meet the king of Gallea, the really hot Lethe (in those gay furries, thats right, you). They also meet Mordy... I mean Mordecai, hes awesome. Then they do more things, the hot pegasus knight, Marcia joins up, and then they rescus the really hot, and I mean hot, Nephenee (ever her name is hot). They also rescue Brom and Kieran, who is crazily awesome, and is Oscars supposed Rival...oh noes I forgot about that cunt Myrmidon, Mia... Did I mention the bad ass thief Volke?

Now for the fun part, Chapter 11. In this infamous Chapter, the infamous Zihark, McFUCKINGOWNSYOURASS, comes to town. He joins and owns everyone in site. After wards they go on a boat, and them pesky cunt birds attack, but Jill comes to, not save the day. After my corny jokes, things happen, and some hot girl named, errr, joins, and gets Gatrie to join. Then they go to Begnion, meet Tanith, the wonderfly sexy Falcon Knight, and her superior, Sigrun, who is like an 100/10 on the anime hotness scale... They do some more things, see some more people, and then Stefan joins, the uber Swordmaster of Mcbadass. Since I forget a lot, they get the gay swordknight, McGayAss of Gay, to join, commonly known Makalov.

Half Way point of Halfway done. Do some things, rescue some birds, see Naesala, the awesomest sunnuva Lucifer you'll ever meet. Then they mee the kind of Bad Asses: TIBARN. WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO... Anyways, they do some more crap, Shinon rejoins, kill some peasants, rape some woman and men. Devdan joins, but before the half way point, I just fuggin' forgot. After many more corny jokes, and pillaging, they meet up with sir Paladin Geoffry, Swordmistress Lucia, and awesome Bastian of words, did I mention Plot Twists, and Class Change for Volke and Ike?

Anyways, now this. "Black Knight, you killed my daddy, now I kill you" Ike said that. " Luke, I am your father...", replied Darth Vader...whoops, wrong movie. " Kill me, you can try you little ass baby, now I shall own you with my Penirific sword.. I mean the blessed sword Alondite."

The two titans clash, and well, the Black Knight, was busy checking out Mist, so you know, Ike used the Ragnell and owned him...own as in the building colapsed...

Lastly, they get to the final Level, Nasir joins, same with a General...err Tibarn. They own the Soldiers, and shit, and Ike fights Mad King Ashnard of dumbassville. After Tibarn comes in and owns...saves the day, all is well, and Ike and " Suck More Bitch" well do things... not those things.. THOSE things..hint hint.

Thats the end of that Shitting story, so now go cause bodily arm to yourselves, then masterbate off nekked animals.


End file.
